—Bob?
—Did yer tap on me number?
–Er, yeah.
—Well, it’s me then ain’t it yer daft apeth.
—Ah Yeah. No caff today.
—Easter Sunday, mate.
—‘Ave yer got an Easter Egg?
—‘Ave I me bollocks. Waste of money.
—I’ve got two.
—Bloody ‘ell. No sarnies in the caff for you then.
—Don’t matter. We’re only ‘ere once ain’t we?
—I take it yer won’t be going to church then?
—Like fuck I will. You?
—Nope. No chance.
—What yer doing today then?
—Dunno yet.
—Fancy meeting up fer a walk?
—Could do. Where?
—Memorial Park?
—Ah yeah. Couple of old grumpy farts in amongst the dog walkers.
—Yeah and us.
—Hahahaha!
—‘Ere, your Gracie will be off to Cyprus soon won’t she?
–Er…
—I’m sure you said it was 9th April.
—Yeah, summat like that.
—Still not going?
—Nah, mate.
—Shame that.
—Suppose. I’m not that bothered. Let the young ‘uns get on with it.
—I know but it’s yer daughter—
—So? She’s happy, that’s all I’m bothered about.
—Fair enough, mate. ‘Ere, young Maya got me a couple of them app things fer me phone.
—Ah good, what ‘ave yer got?
—Google News and the fuck-all app.
—Eh?
—What?
—The fuck-all app?
—Yeah, it’s for the bank. I’ve never got fuck all in it.
—Oh, hahaha!
—Do you have one?
—Yeah, I call it William.
—Wha’? Why?
—Because its bills that takes anything in there.
–Hahaha! See what yer did there.
—Right, we going fer a walk then?
—Can’t be arsed now.
—No, nor me.
—Caff tomorrow?
—Yep.
—See ya then.
—And Joe?
–Yeah?
—Don’t pocket dial me.
—Oh yeah, speaking to yer once a day is enough.
—Bugger off.
—You started it.
—Right, see yer tomorrow.
—Yeah, d’yer know who’s on?
—Penny I think.
—Ah, sound.